Thursday, August 28, 2008

This Week In Ch33v0z, The Level Grind Edition

It's ch33v0 time once again, and as we all know... with great cheevz, brings great responsibility... or something. Anyway, the ch33v harvest is in, and I've got a standout this week: Too Human, turns out it's a cheevo-fountain in disguise! The ch33vz have been flowing mightily from that title, and while I manage to squeak out a couple more for the week, you aren't going to see much variety. Now for the main event, my week in cheevz.

Battlefield: Bad Company

Colonel-Reached Rank 20-25G

I'm still totally loving this game. Which, if you remember I purchased from Gamefly, without this service I never would have given Battlefield a second chance. This weeks BF:BC cheev was acquired through lots of multiplayer goodness.

Castle Crashers

Melee Is Best-Defeat any boss without using any magic-15G

It's finally here! Castle Crashers has finally made it to the console! It's a Hack-n-Slash-fest of goodness. There isn't much more to say, other than I haven't had much time with it, there is 4 player co-op and you can RIDE TINY DEER! That's right, the deer are sweet and riding them is the shit.

Melee Is Best can be achieved on your very first boss. Just make sure to use the X and Y buttons, and resist the urge to use your super awesome magic powers. Shouldn't take too long, the first boss is fairly easy.

Too Human

The Final Strike-Kill 100 enemies with finishers-10G

Hero to the Aesir-Achieved Hero status (Level 30)-30G

Bane to Goblins-2,500 Goblins defeated-30G

To Hel and Back-Helheim has been completed (all tokens collected) in Single Player or Online Coop Play-80G

Exultation of Steel-Hel has been defeated by the Cybernetic Baldur-30G

Force to be Reckoned With-100 Elite enemies annihilated-5G

Fenrir's Bite-Assigned a skill point to a sentient weapon-10G

Avenger of the Slain-1,000 Undead slain-30G

Display of Power-Execute 2 in 1 move using a Juggle, Ruiner, Finisher, Slide, or Gunfire-5G

The One That Got Away…-World Serpent has been completed (all tokens collected) in Single Player or Online Coop Play-80G

Hunter of Elfkin-500 Dark Elves vanquished-30G

Elite Warrior of the Aesir-Achieved Skilled status (Level 20)-25G

One God Enters, One God Leaves…-Completed 3 Secret Arena Battles-20G

Frozen Vengeance-Ice Forest has been completed (all tokens collected) in Single Player or Online Coop Play-80G

The Call of Battle-First Battle Cry unlocked-5G

Path of Ruin-100 enemies decimated by Ruiners-25G

Trial of Ascendance-Complete a level 1 charm-5G

Chosen of the Aesir-Achieved Adept status (Level 10)-20G

Too Human, the cheev cow of the week! I've milked many sweet cheevoz from this game, and there are still many more to go! Not only does this game offer up a wealth of sweet cheevz, it's also so much damn fun. Most of Too Human's ch33v0z will unlock with normal play, some even without knowing what you did, but here are a few that would benefit from explanation.
The Final Strike can be obtained relatively easily. It requires you to kill 100 enemies using a "finisher". Now, I'm a guy, so I don't read instructions... but a finisher can be performed by pushing both the left thumbstick, and right thumbstick simultaneously towards an enemy. Each enemy killed counts to your total.

Fenrir's Bite will not only give you a cheevo, but a sweet ass attack in the game(a weapon that will do all the dirty work for you). It's the very last item on the skill tree, and once you assign a point to it, the cheev will unlock. The Call Of Battle is done in the same fashion, but a little higher up on the skill tree.

One God Enters, One God Leaves... shouldn't be hard to get, it's just finding the secret areas that will be tough... but don't worry, there are tons and you'll probably get this one by accident.

Trial Of Ascendance was the most confusing, but again, it's probably in the instructions but who needs that? You'll collect these "runes", each rune has a quest attached to it(example: Kill 100 enemies). Once the quest is completed, you can insert "charms" completing the rune and activating it's power. It's all very nerdy, and I'm a little sad that I actually know all this... I digress, by finishing your first level 1 rune, you will unlock this cheevo.

That is all, folks! I'm beginning to drown in video games, last week I didn't even get a chance to play my Gamefly offerings. I'm still hanging on to Frontlines: Fuel Of War (A.K.A. Not as good as Battlefield) and Conan(A.K.A. boring compared to Too Human). Soon we will all be inundated with the holiday glut of games, and who knows what I will do then... my cup runneth over, again.

Thursday, August 21, 2008

This Week In Ch33v0z, The Hack-N-Slash And Vehicular Warfare Edition

New games, new games, and MORE new games! This week has been a flood of new games, and I'm just trying to keep my head above water. This week's list contains 3 NEW games! Frontlines: Fuel of War and Conan from Gamefly, and the recently purchased Too Human! Lots of ch33v0z, lots of new games, and lots of w00t!

Battlefield: Bad Company

Forest Ranger-Knocked down 1000 trees-15G

Vehikill-Got at least one kill in every vehicle-20G

Leatherneck-Played 100 online matches-25G

The love affair continues, Battlefield A.K.A. My new favorite shooter has provided more cheevoz!

Leatherneck and Forest Ranger aren't hard to unlock, they will just take some time.

Vehikill can be unlocked by getting one kill in each vehicle(Helicopter, tank, boat and jeep) in an online versus match.

Too Human

Through the Halls-Hall of Heroes has been completed (all tokens collected) in Single Player or Online Coop Play-80G

Unstoppable: Hall of Heroes-Hall of Heroes has been completed without dying-10G

Unrelenting Rage-Achieved a 100-hit combo-10G

Blooded of the Aesir-Reached Level 5-10G

Death from Above-Kill 100 enemies with air combat-10G

A Valorous Deed-Defeat a polarity enemy-5G

NORN Novice-First Cyberspace Well has been activated-5G

First Step toward Destiny-First Skill Point assigned-5G

Serve Em Up-The player must juggle an enemy which is then killed in air combat by their teammate-10G

New game!!!!! I have been waiting for this game for a while, and I finally have it! Dungeon crawling, RPG-action with all the loot drops and EXP grinding that one nerd can handle! Very awesome game, and I can't wait to milk all the sweet ass cheevz from it.

All but one of the ch33vz I unlocked will be acquired through normal play. That's the Unstoppable: Hall of Heroes ch33v0. This can be done, it just requires you to be careful while playing each level... but who wants to do that!?

Frontlines: Fuel Of War

History Repeats-Complete the final mission on normal difficulty or higher-15G

Living Quarter-Complete the sixth mission on normal difficulty or higher-15G

Living Quarter - Stopwatch-Complete the sixth mission in under 25 minutes-25G

The Mountain King-Complete the fifth mission on normal difficulty or higher-15G

Graveyard-Complete the fourth mission on normal difficulty or higher-15G

Anvil-Complete the third mission on normal difficulty or higher-15G

Captains of Industry-Complete the second mission on normal difficulty or higher-15G

Darkness Falls-Complete the first mission on normal difficulty or higher-15G

What can I say about Frontlines: Fuel of War? It's a very "Battlefield" type of game, in that there are vehicles and large maps. That's pretty much were the similarities end... It's not a horrible game, but it relies heavily on vehicles, which isn't always my cup of tea. I like to be able to choose what I want to do, and the maps are so huge in this game that you NEED a ride to wherever you plan to go. Not to mention, there can be up to 100 players in one game... just too much for my tastes. Finally, the campaign is INCREDIBLY short and rather boring. I was able to beat it in an afternoon. All the cheevz I unlocked can be done by completing the campaign on normal difficulty or higher, I thought there might be one for the hardest difficulty so that's what I played it on... there is not. Make sure you do this on normal, so you can speed run through the game and snag those cheevz too.


Dragon Slayer-Defeat the Sand Dragon in the lost city of Shem and obtain The Ward of the Earth-10G

Treasure Seeker-Find 5 treasure chests-10G

Defeat Cleaver's Army-Defeat the Bone Cleaver and his army in Barachan Isles and obtain The Ward of Fire-10G

Slice 'n Dice-100 dismemberments-10G

Hands-On-5 Grapple Kills-10G

Losing His Mind-Decapitate a captain with a shield-20G

Free Fall-Kill an enemy by death fall-10G

Shish Kabob-Impale an enemy-10G

Noble Conan-Save a Maiden-10G

Ok, let me preface this by saying this is a total ch33v0-grab. The graphics are horrible (save the death sequences), the story is ridiculous, and the enemy AI are crap. This game is also guilty of a mortal sin, the same cheevo-tile for EVERY FUCKING CHEEVO. That's lazy and stupid. The one saving grace of this game? The graphic violence(and nudity, check it peeps!). I LOVE that you can slice a person in two... and watch their entrails flail about! Beheading and dismemberment galore! I LOVE that SO much... hmmm, I seem to be aroused. Anyway, all the ch33vz in this one are unlocked through normal play!

Something I have to comment on, is the nudity. It's ridiculous and hilarious. You'll stumble upon a half naked "maiden", free her, and then be offered sex. The first line I heard from this maiden was, "Thank you! I want you to crush me with your manhood!", she then bent over. So, yeah... not a kid's game. I spent about 15 minutes trying to activate the "manhood crushing" button, but appearently there isn't any... fuck.

So that's it for this week in cheevz, I still have much to harvest and I'll be working dilligently to squeeze what I can. Next week brings even more games, with the release of the highly anticipated Castle Crashers and the highly explosive Mercenaries 2: World in Flames. I'll be financially barren, but my cup will runneth over with sweet cheevoz.